Shady Vans

What a massive surprise.  A van that stops for kids.  I didn’t see that coming (but neither will the kids).

Not sure what this van does or why it stops, and why children would be crossing in front of it, but a closer look into the window shows that it’s carrying no inventory or boxes….

Shady Rating: 5.1 (those windows are too clear for anything higher)

Holey moley.  Is that a freakin’ heart?

That’s a custom window job there, Shady.  Nothing defeats the spirit of hope in a youngster than seeing a bleak amount of sunlight poke through a heart-shaped window.  Painting the van black can’t hurt either — it must get to be 106 degrees in there in the summer.

Shady Rating = 8.8

At first glance, this van doesn’t seem so shady.

You start to think to yourself, “Maybe this is a work van…these guys seem like they’re at work… yeah, maybe painters or something.”  Then they grab you, put you inside, and make you realize the true depth of darkness in a completely windowless van.  Hey, is that back door welded shut?

Shady rating = 8.5

Inconspicuously parked next to what seems to be a Department of Water and Power building, this shady has too many windows to really be dangerous… or is that the trick?????

Shady Rating = 4.2

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Check out the Shady, Bringin’ the Bling!

Nothing attracts the youngsters more than a shiny nickel!  And no windows to boot!

Shady Rating = 9.2

If you get lured into this shadester, it’s your own fault.  It’s a short bus shady.  Come on.

It’s parked right outside an unsuspecting (really?) housing development.  Yes, there is a massive window in the back, but it’s covered with a curtain.

Shady Rating = 7.7

Yikes.  Parked by itself in the back of what looks to be a seaside parking lot.  Black glazed windows.  Not a rear double-hatch, but a single (and tough to open from the inside, no doubt) back door.

All the finishing touches (including the shadiest dirty tires we’ve seen in a while) needed to make this into a full-fledged shady van.

Shady Rating = 8.72.

Don’t be mistaken.  This shiny, family-looking vacation wagon is a shady-in-disguise.  What better distraction than to look like a friendly traveling band?

Shaded windows are a plus.  Also, it’s parked in front of a hotel.  Waiting for check-out stragglers.

Shady Rating = 8.2

On the top of a nice glen, this tartan-covered RV is on the lookout for young Scottish lads.

Shady Rating = 6.8.

Windowless?  Check.

Rusted-out, barely attached roof?  Check.

Parked in the middle of nowhere?  Check.

Missing spare tire?  Check.

The complete package!  This extended cab is the best shadester we’ve seen in a while!  It even features an escape hatch on top… well, I guess it might be taunting to call it an escape hatch… if you’re not tall enough to use it…

Shady Rating = 9.